The Pushbutton Ways
I just love these businesses and other enterprises that don't have the common decency to communicate with you using their natural, human voices. Instead they assign machines to do all that and many other kinds of work as well. No wonder jobs are so hard to come by. Therefore can't it said that one of the most important causes of the currently high national unemployment rate is often that force so uneasily called "progress?"
Still, if these orgs expect you to have a cellphone or any other kind of new-fangled pushbutton telephone, then the least they could do would be to make sure that everybody gets issued one of those things free of charge whenever their idea of replacement time rolls around, instead of arrogantly assuming that everybody has upgraded to the latest little thing strictly on their own, when in fact you still have several dial-up, pull-around phones that continue to work just as well -- except when some dummy machine in the other world expects you to instantly set down all the important things that you are doing and instead hearken quickly to all that unexpected and rude ringing, only to be told, first thing, that if so and so is true, then push "1," and so forth and so on, and because you have no means to do that even if you wanted to, you must hang up then and there.
I can't help often recalling one fine day way back in 1950 or thereabouts when a bunch of us "colored boys" in ROTC were taking a break from all the rigors of that activity, not least of which was the indignity of having to wear a military uniform on certain days to school instead of one's usual raggedy and therefore comfortable college attire, and someone asked what was so important about all that drilling and marching hither and yon with antique, emasculated rifles.
"The next war will be a pushbutton war anyway," he said. "The white boys will push 'em and the niggers will polish 'em."
I guess that's why I have always avoided letting myself get into pushbutton situations and why I will continue to do so for as long as possible, and my wife will just have to stay home more often if she doesn't want to miss getting any of those phone calls from out-of-body electrons.
Still, if these orgs expect you to have a cellphone or any other kind of new-fangled pushbutton telephone, then the least they could do would be to make sure that everybody gets issued one of those things free of charge whenever their idea of replacement time rolls around, instead of arrogantly assuming that everybody has upgraded to the latest little thing strictly on their own, when in fact you still have several dial-up, pull-around phones that continue to work just as well -- except when some dummy machine in the other world expects you to instantly set down all the important things that you are doing and instead hearken quickly to all that unexpected and rude ringing, only to be told, first thing, that if so and so is true, then push "1," and so forth and so on, and because you have no means to do that even if you wanted to, you must hang up then and there.
I can't help often recalling one fine day way back in 1950 or thereabouts when a bunch of us "colored boys" in ROTC were taking a break from all the rigors of that activity, not least of which was the indignity of having to wear a military uniform on certain days to school instead of one's usual raggedy and therefore comfortable college attire, and someone asked what was so important about all that drilling and marching hither and yon with antique, emasculated rifles.
"The next war will be a pushbutton war anyway," he said. "The white boys will push 'em and the niggers will polish 'em."
I guess that's why I have always avoided letting myself get into pushbutton situations and why I will continue to do so for as long as possible, and my wife will just have to stay home more often if she doesn't want to miss getting any of those phone calls from out-of-body electrons.
posted by Carl (aka Sofarsogoo) | 1:08 AM
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