Infernal Crystals

My "gouty arthitis" has eased up, and I am able to get around without the use of a cane and such, but I am still not out of the woods, and it's going to take time.

Two days ago I was invited to a horseshoes session at G.'s place, but the pitching part of it -- not the talking part -- was a disaster. In the one game that I played, N. and I lost 11-1, and I only managed to throw two shoes that might have been points, only to have both cancelled ahead of time by the ringer that G. already had sitting there.

In horseshoes, or at least in the way that I pitch, it is absolutely essential to make two strong strides forward, the first with the left foot and the second with the other, motions that help to propel the heavy shoes up and over to the other peg with reasonable accuracy 40 feet away. But that becomes badly impaired when the infernal crystals in and around the joints of both big toes reduce one to making only painful half-steps.

Throughout the early part of my life it was my impression that gout was a long-vanished ailment of some sort that had been purely the province of men who now moved about only in my English Literature books -- paunchy, bewigged British country squires and city gentlemen in the 1700's, who also suffered from goodies like the yellow bile, the black humours, and what was thought to be especially cool, melancholy. Otherwise I never heard of anyone in my world getting it, and even today I still haven't managed to drop that quaint and badly mistaken perception completely out of my head, so that to have that affliction still seems to be bizarre and even a little embarrassing.

"Gout." What an ugly word, and so unthinkable! Yet it is actually quite common, and today the estimate is that at any given time 5 million Americans, usually men, have to endure the pain of it, and it is called the "Rich Man's Disease," because it is thought to be caused by eating rich foods.

Rich food or not, science says that the culprit is uric acid, which builds up in the joints of the feet, mainly at the big toe, and it creates crystals there that cause the inflammation and the pain.

So I've been wondering why a device can't be invented that gives out rays that dissolve the crystals without hurting anything else in there. It seems highly feasible to me, and I have in mind not some infinitely complicated instrument that only specialists in hospitals are licensed to use, like the kidney stone machines, but a simple, handheld device for use on the feet and that could be sold in any corner drugstore.

But fat chance of anything like that! As shown by all the evil and totally misguided intentions that are being marshalled today to beat down any attempt to reform health care in this country, there are too many people who are bound and determined to keep all health prices up at astronomical levels, so as to keep amazing profits flowing into the coffers of the drug makers, instrument makers, insurance companies, and other corporatists who profit so handsomely from the pain and suffering of people who can't easily treat themselves and are otherwise kept from getting the best care by insurance difficulties and by having no insurance at all.